Stuff my Parents Say

Laura and Mom come home from church.

Mom: (yelling) Dad! Are you awake? Are you up? (No answer) Dad!

(Laura goes to the computer room to only to see Dad sitting at the computer, not more than fifteen feet away from where Mom is calling him)

Laura: Mom, he's right here.

Mom: Huh?

Laura: He's in the computer room. (Mom makes here way to where Dad is sitting.)

Mom: Laura, we were married in 1970. Do the math.

Laura: (laughingly) Mom, that's thirty-six years. Well, thirty-six years in April.

Mom: Dad! Do you hear that? Thirty-six years and you do not even talk to me! What are we going to do when it's fifty years? We are not going to talk to each other! What do you have to say to that?

Dad: Let's eat.