I Eat Babies

At about lunch time today, my dad asks me if I wanna go out for lunch. I was super excited and tickled pink, because this was the first time he's asked me to go out for lunch in the month I've been working there. The only way I can explain my happiness is that after we agreed to go out, I started marching down the hall, straight-legged and my arms in full swing with one arm straight behind me and my other arm at a ninety degree angle with my elbow horizontal in front of me, like some weird five-year-old-kid version of goosestepping. When one of my coworkers, Lyn asked me why I was so happy, I replied, "I'm going out to eat with my daddy!" It was just a nice father-daughter thing to do.

Anyway, we decided to go to place called Hello Sushi, because it's only a thirty second drive from where we work (if we hadn't been pressed for time, I probably could've gotten Dad to walk there.) While I was there, I ordered one roll of yellowtail and scallion sushi. Dad got a bento box. I also ordered an appetizer, baby octopus in seaweed salad.

When I ordered the baby octopus, I was expecting some octopus in a salad, all cut up into little pieces, like bacon bits but bigger.

I got SEVEN WHOLE BABY OCTOPI on a soft bed of seaweed strings.

At first I was so surprised. I wasn't sure I was gonna eat it. That lasted about three seconds. Then I picked one up and bit the head off. It was delicious! If I had to choose between squid and octopus, I'd choose squid, but for octopus it was pretty good!

I asked Dad if he wanted some, and he said, "Oh, I don't know. It looks weird." He told me when he was young, he used to go snorkling with his friend Jimmy from down the street, and they'd see baby octopi swimming in the water around them. He ate one, because he likes to try things. He liked it too. So, I ate the rest of them except for one more, which I made my dad eat, making the count Laura 5, Dad 2.

Now the four ladies I work with are all born and bred in Michigan, and they're very Middle America, German roots type of people. They just don't eat seafood or Japanese cuisine very much. The first time I brought food from Hello Sushi to the clinic, they all gathered around to watch me eat with chopsticks. So, I was expecting some questions about what we ate. Diane had already gone home, so I told Vicky, Sandy and Lyn.

Vicky: So where did you and your father go for lunch?

Laura: Hello Sushi.

Sandy: Oh, so you went there again, didja? What did you eat this time?

Laura: I had sushi...

Sandy: I can't stand eating raw fish.

Laura: ...and baby octopus. (Vicky and Sandy both scream.)

Sandy: Hear that Vicky? She ate baby octopus. Was it raw?

Laura: No, it was cooked.

Sandy: Laura, do you realize you ate something's babies?

Laura: It was good! It's like veal, but better! (Vicky and Sandy are both laughing hysterically. Lyn comes in.)

Vicky: Hey Lyn! Laura ate some baby octopus. (Lyn, who was busy with patients, made a face and left.)

Sandy: Did you eat the head?

Laura: Yeah, of course. The baby octopus was only about two inches long. One inch of it is all head. If you don't eat the head, there's nothing to eat. (Sandy and Vicky make ick faces.)

Sandy: Well, did you have anything with it?

Laura: It came with a seaweed salad.

Sandy: Seaweed? Vicky, she ate that nasty stuff that they find at the bottom of lakes...

Vicky: I heard!

Laura: No, from the ocean!

Sandy: Well, are you comfortable eating seaweed from the ocean, with all that fish pee and salt?

Vicky: It adds that extra bit of flavor. What did it taste like Laura?

Laura: Well, like urine I guess. (Vicky and Sandy laugh hysterically again.)

Sandy: Vicky, she's learnin'!

Vicky: A little too well, I think!

Sandy: Laura, you know we're just joking with ya.

Laura: Yeah, of course.

Then Sandy told me that if it doesn't come from a chicken, pig or cow, she doesn't want to eat it. Maybe, if I work there long enough I can get her to eat a shrimp :-).